When asked the question, “Kegan, What is your biggest fear?” I kind of just sit there for a few seconds thinking whether or not I should say the socially accepted answers such as “spiders, snakes, clowns, or heights.” Don’t get me wrong, they do scare me a little; but in reality, its the uncertainty of the future that scares me to my core. “Where will I be in 10 years? Will I be happy? Will the ‘friends’ I have now be there for me as I think they are now? Will the people most important to me even be in my life? Will I find my soul-mate? Are the fantasy’s of my tomorrow ever going to come true?” To answer these questions.. I don’t have an answer for them yet. I’ll just have to live my life to the fullest in order to gracefully  meet the unknown. But its the waiting that slowly kills me..

I’m only a sophomore in high school, yet I’m already fretting that I only have two years left of “the best four years of your life”. I sometimes find myself waking in the middle of the night from the frights that occur in my head. You see, I have this reoccurring nightmare, where I am given the opportunity to have the career I have wanted for quite some time now (becoming a psychologist) or the life that I have always dreamed of (being rich and famous). The times I chose the path of my career, I end up being rather successful and well known, but I have no friends or family. The times that I chose the rich and famous lifestyle, I still have no family that really loves me, and my “friends” are just social statuses… So basically my nightmare is saying I’m going to end up alone.  Another one of my biggest fears, so you could say, is going through life alone. Sure, I have one of the greatest best-friends anyone could ask for, Tyler, but I can literally stress myself to the max that I will lose him at any moment. My life would be so different now if he were to have never made the influences that he did, and I thank him for everything he has done everyday.

Sometimes, I just wish that there was a switch that would turn it all off, just for a day. Stress from everything that is happening in my life is literally going to cause me to lose my sanity. But, luckily for me, I’ve been told to hang in there, and try my hardest day. by. day..

~Kegan

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